OMG! i juz screwed up everything..haiz..everytime i msg HIM i always screwed up everything sia...haiz..juz now de 2 ofus were msg-ing abt friendliness..den i go start de ignore between us by bringing up the topic when he Pang seh me during our last visit to Escape Theme Park..he say he didn pang seh me. den i was lyk 'oh, ya...as if u didn pang seh me' he pang seh me for 3 of them sia..den only John n khairul talk to me..NBCB la..wlao..den i go sent him a msg tat made me cried..LOLs..i dun wanna write this msg here lest i start crying again..haiz..why do we have to quarrel almost everyday? i love him..but why sia..do i have to go through this almost every f**king day..?he might be used to my attitude la..but i duno why i was so..so angry wid him these fews days over small lil things..juz cnt understand.he always give in de la..hmmm..in de past, everytime we quarrel is always me msg-ing him a 1000words 'sorry'. den in de end he say he's not angry. he might really not angry , or he is juz faking..i duno..i really duno..i duno wats goin through his mind now.i dun even know if im his fren or not. its juz so sucky, man..every good things always comes to an end so soon before u can even enjoy. even before u can rmb wats happening. maybe can rmb a lil, juz a lil, but not so vividly.right? i juz wish tat he would really forgive me for all de harsh words i used on HIM in de past, in de present. i dun meant wat i sent. i really dont. de thing i hate to do most is to quarrel with HIM. why cant we be good frenz n co-opearate wid each other for juz de last yr tgt? he's gonna be graduating next yr..i wanna graduate wid him too. but de consequence is tat i have to go ITE to study. I dun mind. i dun mind goin to ITE as long as i can graduate wid him...But on Wed, Joseph n Farid, My 2 good 9yrs-and-still-counting frenz told me to go to the same Poly as HIM. they asked me to go to de same poly as him, study de same course as HIM so tat if i gt any prob im not sure de i can go ask HIM..but im really not sure if i can go into de same course as HIM not.even if im in de same course, i wonder if he still rmb me..i wonder..i really do..i dont know why im being so emotional these days. i tend to vent out my anger on HIM sia..haiz.if He's reading this, im really really really sorry for wat ive done..can forgive me??